This is my face
An old face
In a world that fears death
& tries to ignore it
& so fears old age
& tries to ignore it too
But it won’t go away
Just as I won’t go away
This is my face
A trans face
In a world that wants men to be men
& women to be women
& tries to suppress
Those of us who cross the line
Those of us who defy the frontiers
& wants us to disappear
But I won’t disappear
I love my femaleness
& I love my maleness too
Because I am old enough
To have known much hatred
& old enough to have overcome it.
So I love my aging
& death is my sister
& life my lover & friend
Jo Clifford 13th April 2024
I wrote the poem to go with the picture for it to be exhibited in the No vacancy gallery here in Melbourne.
The artist, Chris Ferric, wrote:
“Title/year of artwork: Saint Jo, Scribe of Our Souls / 2023-2024
Medium: Oil and brass leaf on wood.
This painting is for Jo, my friends, my communities.
Jo is disabled, sexy, trans, old, and worthy of the care and attention required to paint an oil portrait made-up of many caresses of her face and body.
Jo was ordained by The Order of Perpetual Indulgence. She is surrounded by a halo of golden nibs gifted by Brother Bimbo.
This portrait bears scars from mishandling by a major state gallery. They aren't hidden, they are part of her story, in gold.
Jo is manifest fully: father and grandmother; Elder; playwright; performer; Queen Jesus; St Jo, Scribe of Our Souls.”
I love them for saying that.
I love the picture.
Seeing it in the gallery on Thursday night was the first time I had actually seen it as a real artwork.
It sent shivers up and down my spine.
There is something utterly miraculous in the energy of this picture and the life that shines out of it.
Chris has taken the most traditional art form imaginable and, with astonishing skill, subverted it on so many levels.
It has just won a major art award. And I’m happy to see that Chris’s wonderful artistry is beginning to get the respect and appreciation it so deserves.
And as for the painting itself:
It is so queer and so glorious it takes my breath away.
This is beautiful, dear Jo! Many congratulations, and much love… . j xxx 💕🎉🌿
And to think I got to see you and spend time with you and all your glorious energy on that very day. ❤️
I must go and see the portrait and feel its magic. It captures so much of your essence.
As our bodies age and our vessel begins to wither…inside we are still the child, and to me you are always vibrant and wise and wonderful.
I can so relate to that fear of death…I’m not ready…but each breath I take brings me closer….and I’m not ready for my mother to go either and she will be 87 this year. Thank you again for getting in touch with these fears so that I can release them and love whatever glorious life I have left.
Love you.